According to Homer simpson, Love is two naked babies that are married.
Love has many roles in our lives, and so to define love, is to define ourselves. Many people would try to explicate what love SHOULD be, and not what it really is. For example, love is not wanting to spend every moment of one’s life together, and love is not having respect for one another. There are many cases where love does exist between two parties, where there is no mutual respect. This does not assume that there is no love, just there is a largely dysfunctional component within the relationship of two people that have love one for one another.
There is partner love, sibling love, parent love, friend love, and child love. There is a new kind of love for every relationship that we have in our lives. For every role that we play in another’s life, there is potential for a new kind of love. There can be no sliding scale of which kind of love is greater or more powerful. All of these forms of love are set up by the boundaries of the relationships we posses. Love, therefore, has a very human, and imperfect element that makes universal truth impossible.
Sexual love is culturally constructed to be the most powerful form of love that one can experience, but I wholeheartedly disagree. Sex and intimacy are two different facets of any given relationship. They do not always go hand in hand. Allowing yourself to be sexual with someone does not make you nearly as vulnerable as opening up your soul and being intimate with someone. Love doesn’t always have a physical connection. Those who are intimate have a far greater bond than those who simply fornicate. Opening your soul is much more difficult than opening your legs, and therefore, it’s consequences are much more powerful. Sex can be used to increase the bond in partner love, when souls are spirits are shared dually. BUT, love is not sex.
The love that a parent has for a child SHOULD, by far, outweigh the love for their partner, or siblings. I simply don’t know if this is true, as I am not yet a parent. However, I can attest to the fact that having an innocent, helpless child in your life invokes an extreme sense of responsibility, protectiveness, and altruism—among others. Is love, then, these strong feelings of empowerment that we experience through another’s presence in our lives? Love can cripple you, when it is given in the right context, by a less than perfect person. Therefore, love is not parenthood, and it is not empowerment.
One could argue that love is wanting more for someone, or the willingness to sacrifice one’s own happiness to help another. Is love altruism? One could argue this point forever, and again, there is no universal truth. What about the parent who loves their child, but beats her/him? It is possible that a parent could want a better life for her/his child, and be willing to suffer for it, but resent the suffering? Perhaps they are a doting parent by day, and a raging alcoholic by night. Alcoholism is their coping mechanism for stress, and feelings of inadequacy, and is no reflection of any love lost for their child. However, one could argue that a parent SHOULD love their child more than their addictions, and be willing to overcome them with the feeling of empowerment that exists when holding that innocent, helpless baby in their arms. One could argue, but one could not conclude. I am sure that parents who are weak in their souls love their children, but are not strong, smart, brave, etc. enough to confront their fears and become a better person for their child’s sake. This does not mean that they do not love their children, therefore, altruism is something that may be common in the publicly romanticized version of love, but it’s occurrence in reality is random. Love is not altruism. Love is human.
Love also does not exist in any identifiable form. People who love one another may not always verbalize their feelings. Love is not the profession of such. It is entirely subjective, and as such, may not be a mutually shared experience.
HENCE
Love is completely subjective, and open to interpretation, and it doesn’t always have to make us feel good. Love is part of the human condition, and is one of the ways we manipulate our environment, and connect with one another. Love is something or someone that brings us closer to ourselves, when we set out to explore love. Love is defined by the boundaries of the relationships it exists within.
Love is a subjective, human experience.
